A Shadow in the Ember

“There were, and things went both good and bad. It’s never easy making that choice. Life is important, liessa, but what comes after is an eternity. I know many believe that things are black and white. That if you do this or that, you will be rewarded with paradise or punished. It’s never simple. There are people who do terrible things, but that doesn’t always mean they’re terrible people.”

“I do have the authority. Over you. Over everyone here and every mortal in and outside of this realm, but that is not why I have these conditions. They are in place to help keep you safe.”

“I think it’s all the wicked, indecent bones in my body guiding my thoughtfulness.”

“My father loved my mother more than anything in these realms. More than he should have. And still, he could not keep her safe. That is why I have these conditions. These rules as you like to call them. It’s not about me attempting to exert authority over you or control you. It’s about trying to do what my father failed at. It’s about making sure you do not meet the same fate as my mother.”

“Look, it was clear—to me at least—that you didn’t want to do what you believed you had to. That doesn’t mean I agree with your actions or that I’m not disappointed. You seemed to make him…Anyway, it’s not like we don’t have explicit experience in carrying out terrible deeds because we believed we had no other choice.”

“I am known as the Asher. The One who is Blessed. I am the Guardian of Souls and the Primal God of Common Men and Endings. I am Nyktos, ruler of the Shadowlands, the Primal of Death.”

“Touch me, and I will break every bone in your hand. And then I will make sure the Princess has no reason to fear her wedding night or any night she is doomed to spend at your side.”

“I know one thing, liessa. A monster wouldn’t care if they were one.”

“There are many ways you can be taken out. Thousands. And I’m well acquainted with all of them. Your options are endless. Some painless. Some quick. This way won’t be either.”

“What I sensed, what I tasted in the back of my throat, was the bitterness of fear. The tanginess of anguish and hopelessness. And the saltiness of determination and resolve. That was what I felt when I saw you. A girl who was barely a woman, forced to fulfil a promise she never agreed to. I knew you did not want to be there.”

“You feel like silk and sunshine. Beautiful. That’s it, liessa, fuck my hand.”

“But when I’m around you, the last thing I want is to be uncomplicated. Or in control. Or decent. What I want is your taste on my tongue again. What I want is to be so deep inside you that I forget my own fucking name. And I don’t even need to read your emotions to know how much you want that, too.”

“As the Primal of Death, I risk destroying the mortal’s soul if they’re in my presence for any extended period of time, at least for those who have passed through judgement. That is a balance to prevent the Primal of Death from creating his or her version of life. There is no exact rule against it for gods or other mortals, but it wouldn’t be wise. Visiting loved ones who have moved on can cause both the one living and the one who has passed to become stuck—to want what neither can have, whether that be to continue seeing their loved one or to return to the living. It can even cause them to leave the Vale, and that does not end well.”

“Only I get to determine what does and doesn’t involve me. What I do and do not do is of no concern to anyone. Not even a god.”

“All I think about when I’m trying to sleep or eat or am doing anything is how I was the Maiden and found unworthy by the Primal of Death.”

“But you spoke with no fear. You acted fearlessly. Each time I saw you. You interested me, and I hadn’t expected that. I didn’t want that. But at that lake, you were just Seraphena. And I was just Ash. There was no deal. No perceived obligations. You stayed simply because you wanted to. I stayed only because I wanted to. You let me touch you because that was what you wanted, not because you felt as if you had to. Maybe I should’ve told you, but I was…enjoying myself with you. I wasn’t ready for that to end.”

“There is no other choice. Not for you. Not now. Even if you managed to escape punishment for what happened here, I staked my claim on you in front of others. That will spread, eventually reaching the attention of the gods and other Primals. They will become curious about you. They may even believe you hold some sort of sway over me. They will use you, and whatever ways you have paid these past three years will pale in comparison to what they will do.”

“He’s a monster. He’s always been a monster. Our…our father knew that. Everyone knows that. He is, as you said, of little significance.”