A Soul of Ash and Blood

“Do you remember when we were boys, and I first shifted after being in my mortal form for a while? I had trouble separating myself from the wolf, but you were there. You helped remind me who I was. I know it can be difficult to pull yourself out of this, but you’re still in there, and I’m going to need you to come back to me as Cas. She needs you to come back as Cas.”

“Only the bad can be influenced, Princess.”

“You’re going to hate that you begged me to kiss you, to do more. But even without my blood in you, I know you’ve never stopped wanting me. But when I’m deep inside you again, and I will be, you won’t be able to blame the influence of blood or anything else.”

“Nektas. He is one big motherfucking draken.”

“Like I said before, I don’t give a fuck that you’re the Maiden. I would think you would’ve realized that by now.”

“What I was doing to myself was weakening him. You’d think that would’ve been enough to snap me out of it, seeing what it was doing to him, but it wasn’t. I was too lost in my head, though not lost enough that I didn’t know how fucking selfish it made me.”

“I told you the truth, Princess. I’m intrigued by you, and it’s fairly rare anyone intrigues me.”

“I’d already fallen for you, despite what I said to Kieran. I didn’t know it wasn’t only lust and obsession. That I was already deeply and madly in love with you—your stubbornness and bravery, your kindness, and that delightful vicious streak that runs deep in you. I just didn’t know that was what I was feeling because love…it wasn’t something I thought I deserved.”

“Talk to her. That’s what Nyktos did when she was in stasis. I don’t know if she heard him, but I think it helped. I know it helped him.”

“I prefer the name Casteel or Cas,” I stated. “If you don’t want to call me that, you can call me Prince Casteel Da’Neer, the second son of King Valyn Da’Neer, brother of Prince Malik Da’Neer, but do not call me the Dark One. That is not my name.”

“I came back for you that night. Just like I told you I would. I came back for you, and you weren’t there. You promised me, Princess.”

“I should’ve known then, and maybe I did on some subconscious level because that’s when I started rethinking my plans, wondering how I could give you choice and freedom. I think I knew even then, before we spent time under the willow and left Masadonia, that I couldn’t just send you back to the Ascended. But I didn’t know how to acknowledge it. I don’t think I was capable of doing so then, to be honest.”

“Fear and bravery are often one and the same. It either makes you a warrior or a coward. The only difference is the person it resides inside.”

“No one in there will care that he struck the Maiden. Right or wrong, they don’t see her as a person. When they look at her, all they see is a symbol of the Ascended, of those who have killed many of their kin and drove their people to near extinction. That doesn’t mean they all agree with what he did, but you need to think about what it will do if you walk in there and kill him—a wolven who descends from one of the eldest families.”

“Well, damn. So, you’re telling me that you went through the Ascension and completed the Culling without going into stasis?”

“I’d gladly serve any monstrous being if it meant you were safe. I can’t fault him for that. I really can’t. But…I don’t know how I can forgive him for what he planned to do to you. He may not have harmed you with his own hands, but his actions left their marks on you.”

“All it takes is a second for your enemy to gain the upper hand. Nothing more than the length of a heartbeat, given to either arrogance or vengeance, to lose all which truly matters. And if that isn’t something you’ve yet learned, you will.”

“No one knows about any of that—what I used to do to escape everything. Except for Kieran. He knows. He had no choice with the bond.”